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Runner Without Shoes

So...I recently came to a realization about myself. I...I am a runner. No, I don't own any fancy running shoes - in fact, I run better in my regular, every day shoes. No, I haven't spent an unreasonable amount on running clothes to reduce friction and help me run faster - in fact, I run better in my regular, every day clothes. I didn't buy an Ipod and Earbuds to run with - I can run without music. I never pictured myself as a runner. Most people I know wouldn't say they picture me as a runner. But I am definitely a runner. I run - I run from men. I run from commitment. I run from stable, promising relationships.
As soon as they make 'the move' or we have 'the talk' - I bolt. I thought for sure this time would be different. But it appears I am getting too good at running...too used to it. Maybe subconsciously I get some sort of satisfaction...a 'runners high', if you will. It doesn't really matter why I run ... I just do. And I have to find a way to stop running ... ... ...

Comments

Unknown said…
Oh Kriss! Ha! nice analogy. So the possible solution may be to try...not running? Just a thought. Not that I have a lot of room to talk but still it's something you might want to consider. From a purely academic viewpoint it could be interesting. :)
Run into a wall. That will stop you right in your tracks! There has to be a guy out there for you that's worth running to, not away from. You'll find him. In the meantime, watch Runaway Bride and learn from her mistakes. ;)
Jessica said…
Just turn around. Run the other way. I'm with Stacy, there's gotta be someone worth running TO.
Kriss said…
Ha ha - I will have to keep looking for that 'wall' to run into! I have a knack for attracting ... interesting ... guys. I have skills. :)
Kimberly King said…
Kriss,
I totally had this EXACT same problem!!!!! So what happened? I finally found a guy who WOULDN'T let me run away. When I tried to break up with him, he asked me why. He needed specifics, and it turned out that I was just scared. Maybe you just haven't found the right guy yet, Kriss, or maybe you just need to be up front with the guys when you feel the urge to run. My friend (who's now been married for a year) was TERRIFIED of commitment, and refused to keep dating her now husband. But he was patient with her, and let her keep coming around (even though they ended up breaking up LOTS of times). He knew she just needed time to come to accept the idea of a relationship. And finally, when she was comfortable with the idea, she was able to settle down and finally get engaged. You are such a sweet girl, Kriss, not to mention HILARIOUS, smart, interesting, spiritual, etc. You WILL find an awesome guy, I know you will, and you will WANT to be with him. Just keep praying! Also, have you considered counseling, either professional or through the Bishop? I tried this, and it also helped me. Good luck in your journey for love!! :)
Becky said…
Wow; I like your friends...they comment good comments. :) Ditto to what they all said.
Crystal-lynn said…
THIS is yet another reason that we can be friends. Thanks for your honest post.

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