Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Pop! Goes the Tire!

So, last night I thought I was awesome. I was driving on I-15. I was heading to Provo to pick up my visiting teaching companion and be an awesome visiting teacher. I was almost late but had just enough time to be only fashionably late. Thinking I was awesome was my first mistake. Taking I-15 in the middle of road construction was my second.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, I hit a crater in the middle of the road. Thankfully it was less eventful than in the movies - and though my teeth chattered and my hair went whipping with the force of impact, my car came out of the crater in one piece and did not launch itself violently into the other lanes of traffic. But, shortly thereafter, my poor little car started hobbling along like a broken old man. It wobbled and lurched and sputtered and shook violently.

I was conveniently located a good distance from the next exit, so in keeping with the spirit of a broken old man, I pulled into the right lane and drove 20 MPH with my flashers on. If you were stuck behind a moron going 20 on the freeway at approximately 8:36 pm last night - yeah, that was me. We hobbled our way to the exit and pulled into the gas station where I realized that the passengers side door seemed significantly further off the ground than my own door. I called my Mom who wrangled my Dad into the car and they came heroically to my aid - in the middle of my Mom's favorite TV shows, in the middle of the night, in the middle of the freezing weather.

I stood helplessly as I watched my 50-some-odd-year-old parents change my tire. At one point, my Mom even lifted the car by herself. Sure, I stood by her and tried to lift, but I'm pretty sure the only person doing anything was her. Maybe it was just her motherly instinct, but after last night, I am thoroughly convinced that my Mom and Dad are really superheroes masquerading as my parents. And, after all these years of struggling and fighting to be 'independent', I finally realize just how truly dependent I am on them. Thanks Mom and Dad for always coming to my rescue. And thanks for being mine!

Monday, November 15, 2010

The Death of a Phone

Today I came to the stark realization that just because you can use a cell phone, doesn't mean you are qualified to work for the cell phone company. Reason:

My phone died on Friday. Saturday I went to the T-Mobile store to see if they could help me out. It wouldn't charge and it wouldn't turn on correctly. So, I figured my battery was probably just bad. They gave me a new SIM card - that didn't fix the problem. So, the girl told me to call T-Mobile and they should send me a replacement because my phone was less than a year old. I wanted to say -HOW am I supposed to call them? MY PHONE IS DEAD! I did ask what number I was supposed to call - I am sure some people memorize random useless customer service phone numbers just for fun ... but I have better things to do with my spare time and three brain cells. I also asked her if she was sure all of my contacts were transferred to the new SIM card. She was obviously annoyed as she gave me the number and said that either my contacts were on the SIM card or my phone. Thanks, that's helpful.

Well, I called T-Mobile. Of course they can't replace it - I'm just a peon on a gigantic corporate account and I'm 'not authorized' to replace my own dead phone.

So, I waited until I came to work. I submitted the request for a new phone. I got a 'loaner' phone from HR until the new one arrives. I put my SIM card in the 'loaner' and found that all my contacts were not on my SIM card. So, I drove BACK to the T-Mobile store to ask her if she could pull my contacts (all 237 of them) off my dead phone and put them on the SIM card. I didn't ask this because I didn't know HOW to transfer them from Phone to SIM - but because MY PHONE WAS DEAD and I couldn't do it myself. She was like, "well, if your phone won't turn on, then there's nothing I can do for you." She gave me some crap about finding a computer and checking their website to see if maybe possibly my contacts might have been saved to an online account which I cannot access because, again, I am a peon and I'm 'not authorized' to do so! I finally said...."Could you maybe try another battery and see if it will turn on?"

To which she almost exasperatedly said, "You mean you haven't tried another battery?" How do you respond to that? "Oh my gosh! I totally forgot that I have like six spare batteries in my drawer at home. Why didn't I totally think to do that before? You are the smartest person ever! For sure!" Duh! They seriously need to do something about their hiring standards.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Smooth Move. Ex-lax!

Is it bad that I'm still snickering to myself that my coworker just told us her daughter wants to get monogrammed M & M's for her wedding and the initials of the bride + the groom = BM?