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I'll Show You Physical!

Today was my annual dose of public humiliation cleverly disguised as a physical. For those of you who have been subjected to one of the only remaining legal forms of torture, you will know exactly what I am talking about. However, if you have somehow through Divine intervention managed to escape the horrible, life-scarring experience, I simply have nothing to say to you. And, if you are getting a little embarrassed - you should probably stop reading now.

I woke up in a good mood - 'til I remembered. I went to the doctors office -
alone. I waited - insides writhing in horrid anticipation. They called my name - I followed the cute little friendly nurse to the torture chamber. And so it began. And even though my doctor tried to make pleasant conversation, even though she acted truly interested in my occupation and all the other boring details of my boring life, and EVEN though the cute, friendly nurse said she really liked my orange toe nails...my dignity and self-respect are nonetheless smeared all over the inside of a PAP jar.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Just wait till you have kids...it's even worse. I couldn't even count all of the dr's and nurses that were in and out of the room seeing me in all my glory. Don't worry, someday you'll look back and say "Oh my annual physical is today, piece of cake!"
January 19, 2010 at 7:05 PM
Jessica said…
Yeah, no kiddin'. I can drop my top or bottoms for anybody in a dr's office now, lol.
January 19, 2010 at 8:30 PM
kris said…
I'm glad you survived! :)
January 19, 2010 at 8:53 PM
Stacy Lynn Carroll said…
LOL! You describe the experience perfectly!! Unfortunately, once you get pregnant, all sense of dignity and modesty fly right out the window!
January 20, 2010 at 5:00 PM
Unknown said…
well put a check mark in the single non-sexually active column. we still have a sense of dignity and modesty! ha! :)
February 2, 2010 at 3:00 PM
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