Okay, so the doctor seems to think that I might have Narcolepsy (probably spelled it wrong. And NO narcolepsy does not only mean that you fall asleep while walking through the mall or having conversations with people...it basically means the switch in the body that tells you when you've had enough sleep is broken so you never feel like you've slept enough). Anyway, they sent me in to the hospital on Friday. I had a fabulous time...I shall enlighten you.
I arrived at the hospital at 7:00 am (and those of you who know me well know how much of a stretch that is...I mean, I usually don't even get UP until 7:00!). The Sleep Lab technicians immediately began writing on my skull with magic marker and then ever so gently scrubbed all five layers of my dermis off (please, insert heavy sarcasm here) on the previously marked locations. Then they took electrical wires, dipped them in extremely sticky paste, stuck them in the dermis-free zones and TAPED them to my head (and hair) with medical tape...yeah, that's gonna come out easy...
After I officially looked like I walked off Star Trek, they hooked all my loose wires into a box, plugged the box into the computer and said 'Sleep!' Okay, so she was nicer than that but it still had the same effect...I laid in the bed thinking "crap, I only have 20 minutes to sleep...and it's probably already been 12! Go to sleep, go to sleep, go to sleep!" (If you've seen Rocket Man you know exactly what I'm talking about...if not, rent it!).
20 minutes later the technician came in and said 'So did you sleep? Did you dream? How long do you think you slept?" The whole time she's asking these questions, I'm thinking to myself "Lady, isn't that what I'm paying YOU to figure out?!"
Oh, but lunch was the best...I volunteered to get a little blood pumping and walk downstairs to have lunch in the cafeteria. Well, it did get my blood pumping - all those freaked out stares people were giving me. What did I learn from this experience? When you look like a freak, you should probably remain confined in your hospital room! That and I now have a lot more sympathy for people with physical imparements.
I was finally released from the hospital with minor welts from the pasty stuff that ate my skin off. So what did I do after my sleep test? I went home and SLEPT! :D
I arrived at the hospital at 7:00 am (and those of you who know me well know how much of a stretch that is...I mean, I usually don't even get UP until 7:00!). The Sleep Lab technicians immediately began writing on my skull with magic marker and then ever so gently scrubbed all five layers of my dermis off (please, insert heavy sarcasm here) on the previously marked locations. Then they took electrical wires, dipped them in extremely sticky paste, stuck them in the dermis-free zones and TAPED them to my head (and hair) with medical tape...yeah, that's gonna come out easy...
After I officially looked like I walked off Star Trek, they hooked all my loose wires into a box, plugged the box into the computer and said 'Sleep!' Okay, so she was nicer than that but it still had the same effect...I laid in the bed thinking "crap, I only have 20 minutes to sleep...and it's probably already been 12! Go to sleep, go to sleep, go to sleep!" (If you've seen Rocket Man you know exactly what I'm talking about...if not, rent it!).
20 minutes later the technician came in and said 'So did you sleep? Did you dream? How long do you think you slept?" The whole time she's asking these questions, I'm thinking to myself "Lady, isn't that what I'm paying YOU to figure out?!"
Oh, but lunch was the best...I volunteered to get a little blood pumping and walk downstairs to have lunch in the cafeteria. Well, it did get my blood pumping - all those freaked out stares people were giving me. What did I learn from this experience? When you look like a freak, you should probably remain confined in your hospital room! That and I now have a lot more sympathy for people with physical imparements.
I was finally released from the hospital with minor welts from the pasty stuff that ate my skin off. So what did I do after my sleep test? I went home and SLEPT! :D
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